Few issues in life have thrilled me greater than the prospect of seeing Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg tape their knuckles up and step into a hoop to settle their variations like a few misshapen Macaque monkeys tussling over a chunk of fermented fruit. In the event you haven’t heard about this, I urge you to do a fast Google search and acquaint your self with the weird feud presently unfurling between two of Silicon Valley’s greatest ghouls. In the event you’re too lazy to do this, the quick model is that this: these guys, two of the world’s richest, most ridiculous people, declare they’re going to beat one another up for the advantage of a stay viewers—probably at the Octagon in Las Vegas.
It’s unimaginable to say for certain whether or not it is a weird publicity stunt or an actual dispute between two grown males. All I do know is that seeing two billionaires accustomed to the tender white glow of a pc monitor buying and selling poorly aimed physique blows is an concept past thrilling. Actually, so far as I do know, there are solely two people who find themselves not excited by this concept, and they’re Elon Musk’s dad and mom.
In separate current statements, Mommy and Daddy Musk each expressed their respective distaste for the upcoming sporting occasion that includes their son.
In an interview with The Solar newspaper, Musk’s father, Errol Musk, mentioned the next in regards to the upcoming combat:
“The factor is, if this loopy combat goes forward, if Elon beats this man, Elon shall be referred to as a bully, being a lot heavier and taller…Whereas if he loses, the humiliation could be complete…Elon loses if he wins and loses if he loses.”
In relation to the peak and weight differentials, Elon does have one thing of a bonus. TMZ Sports activities studies that Musk stands 6 toes 1 inches tall, whereas Zuckerberg is just 5’7. He’s additionally considerably heavier, which you’ll inform simply by wanting on the two of them. That mentioned, Zuck has been coaching like Rambo—an element that would offset the peak and weight differentials if Musk is significantly out of practice when the combat occurs (he presently doesn’t look like in peak bodily situation, although he’s higher off than he was a 12 months in the past).
Anyway, the elder Musk went on to say that his son truly is aware of some kung-fu strikes however won’t have the killer intuition wanted to place Zuck down:
“Elon aced purple belt in JKA (Japanese Karate Affiliation), the perfect. However he doesn’t know find out how to go for the kill. He cares an excessive amount of.”
Musk’s mother, Maye, additionally appears to be involved that her 52-year-old son is busy planning a fistfight with one other center aged billionaire. In a sequence of current tweets, Elon’s mother tried to steer her son away from violence.
“Battle with phrases solely. In armchairs. 4 toes aside. The funniest particular person wins,” woman Musk tweeted final week. In a distinct tweet, she additionally claimed that the combat had been “cancelled” at her behest. In nonetheless others, she playfully scolded rightwing podcaster Lex Fridman for encouraging the match:
Musk’s dad and mom weighing in on that is fairly humorous as a result of Elon has all the time sorta resembled a tall third grader who simply occurs to have billions and billions of {dollars}. It makes a specific amount of sense that his dad and mom discuss him like he’s nonetheless somewhat boy who must be reigned in.
However to that I say: Elon, like several grown baby value their salt, please don’t hearken to your dad and mom. Please combat Mark Zuckerberg. Please make a coaching montage that includes Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger.” Please stream the combat stay to all of the nations of the world. Don’t let this once-in-a-lifetime leisure alternative slip away from us. The world is relying on you.
